To love and to hold Chap1:4

Matt sat on the couch, looking at the images on the tv.

My mind though was miles away.

I remembered the way i had proposed to her.
Valentines vibe was all over town. Valentines day fell on a wednesday. Suzanne loved valentines day. I began to send her little one word notes, they were all decorated beautifully, glitter heart shapes. I planted them everywhere, in places she visited or used a lot.

Will. Peace. Happiness. Security. Passion. Romance. Friendship. Unity. Financial security. Was written on each card. She would find some in the fridge, another her purse, under her pillow, in her shoe, her desk. Random people would give her the notes.
‘Hello, are you Suzanne? Matt asked me to give you this.’

Suzanne would smile and when she got home, I avoided any talks of the little notes. She caught the grip and played alone. On valentines day, I placed the last note in her hands when kissing her good bye. Will. We enjoyed valentines day.

Two days later I woke up early and left the house quietly.
Kelvin called Suzanne two hours later.

‘Suzanne, you gotta come quick.’
‘Come where? What’s wrong? Is it Matt? I dint find him this morning.’
‘Just come, use the gautrain, you will meet someone who will give you your card.’

Suzanne dressed quickly, praying something hadn’t happened to Matt. She went to gautrain and found Natalie waiting for her. Natalie looked too happy so she gave herself away. Suzanne knew it was a surprise, though she dint know what surprise it was.

When she got off the train, there I was with a big banner in my hand, asking if she would marry me, I had a handful of ballons and all the people that had given her the notes. Going down on one knee I held a ballon to her face.

When she got the ballon, she saw the little box, she opened it and said yes. There was laughter and claps and we kissed.

Where did I go wrong? Everything was fine. She was happy with me. We dint argue much, when we did we easily resolved it. We had plans together. A lot of what she wanted in life I gave her.

Her smiles, her smell, her laughter, her tears, we shared everything together. My deepest secrets, her scares, her concerns, I thought she was the right now for me. And she leaves just like that. No sign, no warning. I understand she had to go see her mother. But she’s even changed her number. Was she hurt because of the night before? Was she that hurt?

How do I move on when I know she’s there around somewhere and I still love her. We even planned the wedding, after she was done with school, we were going to get married. There must be something more to this.


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